Trieste Day 3

Up early for a short walk to Maximillian’s Castle on the coast, Miramare. Built in the late 19^th century by Maxmillian, it sits on a promontory the views from inside are of the sea on all three sides. Inside there’s a suite of rooms built like a ship’s cabin to make Maximillian, the mariner, feel at home. Other than this it’s the standard royal palace with a heavy dose of Northern, Austrian restraint. The gardens are wonderful, with a mix of natural woodland and formal vistas that sweep down to the Adriatic sea. It’s full of exotic botanical plants and trees.

There’s also a bird sanctuary which specialises in humming birds. Destruction of the tropical forest is putting many species at risk, so they’re studying and breeding them here in Italy. There’s around 350 species up and down the Americas from Canada in the North to the southern tip of South America. You get to walk inside a greenhouse and see them fly around your head. They fly differently from other species in that they can hover, even fly backwards, like tiny helicopters. They have to feed on nectar every 20 minutes or they die, as their heart beats at over 1200 beats per minute. Other species included sun birds, Royal Starlings, a Pelican, Flamingo, Cranes, Parrots and so on.

Bus back to Trieste Airport, which has about one flight per hour. I was the only person in the business lounge Got to hand it to Ryanair – cheap, on time and, if you sit in the emergency seats (easy to get – just board at back of plane, plenty of leg room.

Trieste Day 2

Plenty of time before my second lecture in the afternoon, so I listened to some interesting stuff about Creative Commons, recording lectures for re-use by students etc.

Late afternoon I got a lift into Trieste by another speaker. The road into town down the coast follows a lovely promenade that goes on for miles. The city is orderly with a grid of pedestrianised shopping streets and a single canal that cuts into the heart of the city centre. The church at the far end is a sort of Palladian Villa/Pantheon affair and quite ill-proportioned.

We all met in the main square (biggest in Europe apparently) which is open on one side to the sea. Everyone and everything on this coast looks to the sea. The canal, main square, Miramare Castle, the promenades and the boats - they're everywhere. It's the light that gives the place its

character.

Sunny but chilly so went for a Cappuccino in one of those Viennese-like Cafes. Then for dinner next to the short canal followed by a gelato from the best gelato place in town!

Trieste Day 1

Stansted to Trieste, passing over the snow-covered Alps, the Dolomites and the plain in North Eastern Italy. Then a bus down the beautiful Adriatic coast to Gregnano, with the sea on my right hand side. Like the Amalfi coast it’s a green and white, wooded limestone landscape with the sun reflecting off the surface of the sea all afternoon.
Arrived just in time to set up, test my video, listen to William (from Glasgow curiously) give his lecture, before I started. The audience was largely people from developing countries, Zambia, Zimbabwe, S Africa, Egypt, Thailand, India, Sri Lanka and so on, whereas the lecturers were all Anglo-Saxon European or North American bods. In any case both sets of people were delightful. You learn a lot about the state of the world on a short lecture visit like this.
Ate in a restaurant on the shore overlooking the harbour. Marco had promised me a top-class pizza, and was true to his word.

Rome Day 4 - Palatine and Forum

The Palatine was the Beverly Hills of Rome, with Imperial palaces, swimming pools and luxury beyond imagination. The stumps of the huge palaces survive as do the foundations of the pools and gardens. Only in The House of Augustus and Livia do we see real interiors and wall painting. Then to the Forum, wit h its Sacred Way, Arch of Titius (with Menera from Jerusalem), Arch of Septus Severus (with Parthian prisoners), curia (house of the senate and the basilicas and temples that made this the centre of the world for hundreds of years. Even now the sheer scale and expense are obvious. The forum was, from Caesar onwards, a place not only to do commercial and legal business, but to show to the world that Rome was its supreme master. It was designed to impress. The colonnades, statues, temples and scale of the buildings were impressive.

We dropped into see the Ecstasy of St Therese on the way to Termini station, although better known than Bernini’s other work, it seems to have a certain orgasmic notoriety, which overwhelms its aesthetic merit. What it does, is point towards the recognition of the role of sexuality in art. This work is crudely executed and an odd composition, but here expression says it all.

Again on the sexual origin of art, Miller credits Nietzsche as the first post-Darwinian evolutionary aesthetic theorist. The Birth of Tragedy was published in 172 a year after Darwin’s Descent of Man and explicitly states the sexual ‘Dionysian’ origins of art. A cultural courtship model based on sexual selection is developed by Miller who sees art as having a strong inherited genetic capacity. This is nothing short of the evolution of culture and an agenda that is now uncovering cognitive adaptations, their reproductive costs/benefits, variability and heritability. Nietzsche failed to understand Darwin’s basic theory of natural selection and had no sophisticated theory of sexual selection. He was prescient, however, in that he was the first, after Darwin, to advance and elaborate a theory of aesthetics rooted in human sex drives.

OK, enough of the philosophy. Rome is a truly wonderful city with layer upon layer of art, whether it be architecture, painting or sculpture. Only Istanbul comes close as a city with such historical depth. A lot pricier this time and although the food was great, the service was pretty shaky.

Rome Day 3 - Palazzo Pamphilj

Palazzo Pamphilj

Right in the centre of Rome this palace is an ugly selection of dark rooms crammed with paintings, furniture and sculpture. Worse still, the owner ahs decided to explain it all in an audio guide that sounds like Bertie Wooster on acid. The first room has wall to wall paintings, literally commissioned by the square yard to fit the walls. It’s a hideous room, used, as the master of the house says, by bankers – what a surprise. It’s a symbol of complete, tasteless greed.

The one saving grace is Velasquez's Pope Innocent X painting, set in a small room on its own. He sits in his blood-red cloak against blood-red walls and a blood-red hat, the white lower garment just exaggerating the contrast. It is simply one of the greatest portraits ever painted.

Among the hundreds and hundreds of badly hung paintings are several gems, including a Titian, two Carvaggios and several Claude Lorraine's.

Trajan's Forum

This whole complex is now open to the public and contains fragments of marble that show how monumentally impressive the original structure would have been with its libraries, basilica and market. The market, on three levels is not dissimilar to a modern shopping mall with dozens of shops.

Tempieta

Up the hill behind Tavestere to the progenitor for St Pauls, Capitol Hill and thousands of other domed structures around the world. This was Bramante’s invention, a dome raised up on a column, surrounded by columns on a 3:4 ration (diameter to height). It’s a small and delicate structure.

Continuing on the aesthetics theme, art, in particular, poses a problem for evolutionary theory as it doesn’t seem to have a explicable survival function as it seems, on appearance, to be a costly, time consuming activity that should have been selected out. Art, for Miller, is part of the ‘extended phenotype’ with its origins in ochre pigments, cave paintings and figurines. Art provides possible sensory biases and/or fitness indicators.

Rome Day 2 – Palazzo Barberini

Palazzo Barberini

Rome’s Palazzios are huge defensive buildings designed to exude power from the outside and show off your spending power on the inside. Barberini has a Borromino spiral staircase and a huge Salon with a Cortona frieze on the ceiling (curiously the walls are scraped clean and grey). You can lie back on the couches to explore the huge scene. The other rooms have a great collection of paintings, hung so that there’s at least one masterpiece per room. It starts with Raphael’s La Fornarina, her naked torso, ring and arm band revealing his infatuation. There are several Mary Magdalene’s with her flowing hair., a Henry Viii by Holbein, and others.

Good to see that the gypsies are still trying to rob people using the young child in arms, cardboard and pickpocket technique. I’ve never been to Rome without getting accosted like this. I know that I should be upholding liberal values and trying to understand the plight of the Gypsies, but I still don’t understand why they resort to simple theft, when it so obviously backfires. Any sympathy you have for their predicament or poverty fades when you’re robbed by a mother flashing a baby to distract you while her sister dips your pockets.

Interesting chat at evening meal in Tavestere on aesthetics. The sexual selection theory, first developed by Darwin but, it has been argued, largely ignored by prudish Victorians, then revived and recently elaborated I terms of the costs of survival. Perceptual biases may also play a role here, leading to preferences for high contrast stimuli in terms of colour, brightness, loudness and so on. Self expression and variability in art forms can be explained by the advantages afforded by amplifying aesthetic differences. This has interesting consequences for art as, for example, the worth of a work of fiction may not have much to do with its correspondence to truth, but it’s ability to impress potential mates with one’s intelligence and productivity. The sexual selection hypothesis also explains the difference in productive output between males and females as males are competing more intensely than females.

Geoffry Miller is a contemporary proponent of sexual selection as the key driver in aesthetics, part of a general theory that sees reproductive success is the key driver in evolution and not, principally, natural selection. It is sexual selection, he claims, that shapes many of the apparently bizarre ornamental, physical phenomena in species. He also claims that aspects of human cognition have been shaped as sexual ornamentation. The brain has all sorts of aesthetic biases, as our goal is often to be sexually attractive, rather than rational and truthful. This does explain the extraordinary effort that Renaissance art puts into ‘sin’ with acres of naked flesh and fabulous collections as expressions of power.

Rome Day 1 - Villa Borgese

Early arrival at Leonardo da Vinci airport then train to Termini and walk down past Maggiore to Hotel Palatino. Met with the rest of the lads and off for lunch before taking Metro to Villa Borgese, which we’d booked in advance.

Villa Borgese

Bernini’s greatest sculptures are here; David, Aeneus, Rape of Proseprine, Apollo and Daphne, each in the centre of a spectacular room. David Is frozen in that exact moment just before the release of the stone from his sling, so that all of the tension is in his twisted torso. Fantastic facial expression is one of extreme effort – way different from classical contemplative expressions.. Aeneus carries his father with the flame of the hearth in his hand and is a study of loss, not gain. Apollo embraces Daphne just as she escapes by being turned into a laurel. It is a surreal image but the metamorphosis is superb as the uniform colour and texture of the marble turns the transformation into a single blended form. The two Bernini busts of Pope Borgese are side side by side and you can see the crack in the head that led to the copy being made. Bernini gets his fat face in the round and the buttons strain in their button holes. Canova’s Pauline Borgese is sumptuous. She’s half naked holding the apple (Aphrodite’s prize) on cushions that sink with her weight. This is my second visit and it’s great to have the space to walk around these pieces, as the rooms are large and visitor numbers limited. One oddity is the sleeping hermaphrodite, a copy of a Greek original by Polycles.

The whole villa was given over to a major exhibition showing Carravagio’s paintings next to Bacons. Why? I have no idea. There is not real link, historical, aesthetic or otherwise. It’s one of those ‘sound like a good idea’ exhibitions that simply don’t work in practice. Nevertheless, gathering most of Rome’s Carravagios up into one place was too good an opportunity to miss.

Rome is a great place to put aesthetic theories to the test, as there’s a surfeit of art and experiences to savour. If, as I think, Geoffrey Miller and others, as evolutionary psychologists, have got a workable theory that has wide explanatory power as well as a causal explanation, then where better to reflect on it’s worth. They claim, like Hume, that the aesthetic response is embedded in human nature, a universal response to create, exhibit and enjoy beautiful things. This is die to it’s role in sexual selection, in attracting a mate and reproducing. Just as birds of paradise display their ornate wares, so do men and women. I like this as other philosophical explanations tend to focus on necessary,and sufficient, criteria for the definition of rat, or depend upon some notion of a community of practice that simple begs the question as to how that community defines art.

Walked back via a couple of Baroque churches then out to dinner at La Matriciana. This is roman food ‘old style’ with a waiter who looked as though he had been there for 50years. But good solid simple dishes that were perfectly prepared. Pasta is always perfectly al dente. Only flaw were the desserts, but Italian desserts are always a tad predictable.

Love's Labour Lost - Globe

Second play in two days but this is a difficult play, full of tortuous wordplays and difficult to follow, which is why, I presume, it is rarely performed.

It does something quite brave - takes the piss out of schooling and teachers. they're portrayed as boors, full of themselves, producing knowledge filled students through rote learning. Nothing changes then. It's probably the best argument against the teaching of Latin in schools I've ever seen.

The Spaniard is the play's saviour, with his accent and sense of naive fun.

As You Like It - Globe

Spur of the moment decision but well worth it. Touchstone was hilarious with Eddie Izzard inspired facials and asides. Jaques was just as good. His seven ages of man soliloquy was really moving and got spontaneous applause. Just read this......

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms.
And then the whining school-boy, with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier,
Full of strange oaths and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon's mouth. And then the justice,
In fair round belly with good capon lined,
With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws and modern instances;
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slipper'd pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side,
His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank; and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion,
Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.

A bit of a rom-com, as are most of his comedies, and the gender switch is very, very odd to modern eyes.

It was great to just sit back in the sun and let the language do its work. The Globe's often criticised for being too 'heritage' in outlook, but I find the performances thrilling. In fact I'd like them to be even more authentic with drinking and audience heckles. The stewards are like puritan police. I even saw them ask some girls to put their notebooks away!

The groundlings are not what they used to be - as two collapsed because of the heat and had to be carried out!

Day 10 - Perachora

Drove via Corinth, stopping at the Doilkos (ancient track for hauling boats across the isthmus before the canal was dug) then drove to the lake for lunch before jumping off the rocks at Perachora for a swim. This little cove was a Greek port, and has the remains of a Temple of Hera, a stoa, cisterns and underground fountains. Finally, back to Athens for flight.

Day 9 – Nemea

Morning jaunt to Nemea, one of the four sites (Olympia, Isthmian, Delphic and Nemean) for the pan-Hellenic games. The Temple of Zeus, has a few columns restored and re-erected, the baths were worth visiting with their spring-fed basins and pools for the athletes, but it is the running track that is special. Used by the athletes to get from the changing area to the track, it runs for about 100 metres trough the hill and has some interesting homo-

erotic graffiti (X is handsome) and ‘I win’. We staged a mock race then returned for lu

nch to Napflion for a great lunch (chicken in lemon sauce)

and a swim.

Day 8 –Napflion Museum

It’s open at last! For the last four or five years I’ve walked up to the door of this museum only to see a ‘closed’ sign. It’s taken them years to open what is actually a small museum, despite a hefty European grant. It has a credible slide show and some interesting exhibits, including the famous helmet and cuirass, but nothing special. Swim at north beach.

Climbed tto the Venetian fortress, up hundreds of steps, but the cool breeze and views weer worth the effort. I could see the group down below as specs in the water and on the rocks by the town beach. Callum keeps cool!

Day 7 - Swimming

Entire day swimming at sea lake beyond Tolo. Ate far too much calamaris and couldn’t eat anything for rest of the day. Can't say enough about swimming in the sea, especially in greece. I ahte swimming pools but love floating and swimming as the sun goes down.

Day 6 – Epidaurus

Drive to Epidaurus in the morning, one of my favourite Greek sites, as it is set among the pine trees, and the theatre, being the best preserved in Greece, has real presence. Ronnie sang from the orchestra and we visited the stadium, hotel and temples. Back in the afternoon for a swim at the North beach.

Day 5 - Mycenae

Sticking to our chronological schedule, off to Mycenae, through the Lion gate and round the north side to the eastern bastion and down into the dark cistern. I had forgotten how big this site was, and was glad that I had topped up in Athens in the National Archaeology Museum, where much of the Schlieman and later finds are displayed, including the inlaid daggers and gold masks. The beehive tombs are impressive, the largest unsupported arches in the world until the Pantehon. Swim at the huge bay beyond the fortress, but noise of beach party was a little off-putting.

Day 4 – Tiryns

They’ve changed the entrance to the site to the north and access is much restricted, so that it’s impossible to walk in, or even view the site’s impressive arched chambers. Even the guy guarding the site thought it was odd. For example, it is impossible to walk around the outside of the walls (mentioned in Homer), perhaps its most important feature.

Had lunch in the fish restaurant round the bay before swimming from the pebbly north beach, only frequented by Greeks. Tried one of the ghastly fish restaurants on the seafront in town for evening meal, but they’re awful.

Day 3 – Peloponnese

Next morning I got up early, on my own, to walk to the National Museum of Archaeology and was the first in, having many of the rooms to myself. The famous geometric pot with the funeral scene, the giant Kore, then my favourite Zeus/Poseidon? Bronze, showing the absolute confidence of Greece at this time. Apollo with the apple and the astounding Delphic charioteer.

We then headed back to the airport to pick up hire cars, with the usual rip-off by the taxi drivers. Then off to Nafplion in the Peloponnese. Lunch at the seafront Napflion Taverna,opposite the permanently docked grey ship in the harbour, my favourite lunchtime restaurant in this town. It’s the traditional metal trays of slow cooked Greek food. Once ensconced in our villa, just up behind the main square, we walked round the peninsula to the town beach. Ate evening meal in our favourite beef stefado restaurant in street behind main square.

Day 2 Athens, Agora, Acropolis, Acopolis Museum

We woke early and headed off for the Agora, always a good route to take if you plan to visit the Acropolis, as you can walk the Panathenaic Processional way to the entrance. The reconstructed Stoa is as cool as it was originally designed to be, with its Doric ground floor and Ionic first floor, a feature first seen at Perachora, which we plan to visit later. Where the ori

ginal shops would have been there’s the excellent Stoa Museum. The pottery collection hers is top class with some unusual pieces such as a child’

s commode. But it’s the objects that reflect Athenian democracy that amaze; the collection of ostrica (pot bases) inscribed with Themostocles name and the slot machine used to select

jurors. The law courts were here and various forms of Athenian democracy practised within its precincts. The other main building is the Temple of Hephaestus, a Doric structure, built after the completion of the Parthenon.

We then walked up to the Acropolis to see the Parthenon, at various times a Temple, Christian Church, Mosque, explosives store and now museum piece. Despite being, robbed of its sculptures, defaced by Christians, eroded by acid rain and blown up by the Venetians, it’s still a beautiful structure. The famous curvature of the stylobate, columns and cella walls make it seem light in structure but it would have been its external sculptures that would have made it seem like no other temple. After a walk over to the Erechtheum, a more delicate Ionic structure, set on the north side of the Acropolis, we headed off to the new Acropolis Museum.

We walked over the glass floor above the new excavations and paid the token 1 Euro entrance fee in the huge entrance hall containing little more than a cafe. The sloped entrance has a superb collection of pottery and sculpture, and the first floor, the kore and korai lead you past the famous Critian Boy. My friend David has a full size replica of this in his hallway. It was found as rubble in the walls after the destruction of the Acropolis by the Persians and has the slight gait, twist and asymmetry that pre-figures the golden age of Geek Sculpture. Then round to the caryatids a the frieze from the Temple of Nike with the woman leaning down to fix her sandle, her dress falling off her shoulder.

The top floor is less of a museum than a political statement. Like a shop window dummy without a dress, it’s largely a series of plaster casts from the British Museum, the remaining blocks being of poorer artistic merit and badly eroded. I happen to agree with those who argue for the return of the Elgin Marbles as they were robbed during an occupation, split an artwork in two and are remote from the building which they originally adorned. However, the propaganda in the film, with its Americanised narration and mispronunciation of Elgin (as El Gin) will do the Greeks no favours.

We walked back to the hotel from the museum and saw the other side of Athens. through an area North of the Acropolis that was full of young male immigrants, of all nationalities. The police were everywhere, and even although we were in Athens for only two days, we heard of the problems this was causing. They had recently flooded in from all parts of Greece, and the heavy police presence, coded operation Hoover, was attempting to contain and control the problem. The original residents have fled central Athens leaving a sort of immigrant ghetto. The abandoned Apollon Hotel has become an illegal shelter for many. Around Omonia Square, where there are many tourist hotels, you can see junkies and threatening packs of young men. This is a complicated issue, as Greece lies on the frontline of Europe when it comes to immigration from Afghanistan, Pakistan, Sudan and so on. Most arrive via Turkey as the Turks do not respect the bilateral agreement to repatriate, so the islands are being swamped by asylum seekers. Even though it only grants asylum to 1% of applicants, and has been reasonably generous in the case of Albanians in the past (500,000), it is experiencing a flood of illegal immigrants. The detention centre in Samos has 580 on hunger strike and the police are rounding up immigrants in Athens, expelling many. All of this in a country experiencing high unemployment, political unrest and the rise of extremist right-wing parties.

Day 1 Athens

Arrived late and took taxi straight to hotel. Taxi drivers tend to be a good barometer for the ‘business ethos’ of a country and I’ve always been ripped off by taxis drivers to and from Athens airport. In a country that depends on tourism for income, you’d think this would be sorted out. However, Athens was pleasantly warm and we had dinner on the hotel roof, with a view of the Acropolis.

Qatar Day 5 - Business, Museums, Souk

Limousine downtown to the business meeting, where we met Charlie Watt, an old acquaintance of mine and some friendly Qataris. We arrived early so took a walk to the Corniche that swept round the bay, in the absolutely blistering sun, where a family of Qataris were sitting quietly underneath a palm tree watching a western woman jog in the 45 degree heat. I’m not sure which they were more shocked by, her skimpy black leotard sportswear or the fact that she was running in this heat.

The two meetings went well so we decided, on Charlie’s advice, to take a taxi to the Museum of Islamic Art. This was well worth it. Designed by Pei, it a pile of cubic structures, on several levels, like a pile of well ordered blocks,, punctured by motifs from Islamic architecture, including a feature reflecting the eyes of a veiled woman. It sits on an island with a long ramp, with fountains, leading to the front door. Inspired by a mosque he saw in Cairo, it has an open square hall with a marble, geometric floor in cream, black and orange and a huge hanging lamp, as one sees in the large mosques. The roof is suspended on two sets metal points, at different heights to give the sense of a front and a back, with a stalactite dome and oculus. Two of the floors have a superb collection of calligraphy, poetry, tiles, glass, metalwork, doors, mosque lamps and so on. These are all quality pieces. On either side there are areas with fountains and pools of still water, reflecting the Islamic love of gardens and water. The temperature on the Limousine dash board read 47 degrees! Back to the hotel where we ate some lunch, had a sleep, then were picked up by Charlie at 7 pm. He took us to the Souk Waif where we walked, talked and had an excellent Indian meal. The Souk was a fine place, with the usual alleyways, ceramics, honey, dates and so on.

Charlie explained the political situation and attempts by Qatar to diversify by creating a knowledge economy (very different from Kuwait where the focus is on banking and communications). What both (indeed all GCC states) have in common is a bloated public sector and a malaise among a population who have grown used to living on the fat of oil production. Again , the roads were full of crazy drivers in powerful vehicles and Charlie had already (in seven months) known of one person he worked with die at the hands of boy racers. There’s almost no crime but plenty of corruption, as kin is the primary social unit. Layering commercial structures and public institutions on top of family groups causes problems, but that’s the way it is. I have to say that Doha seemed much more planned and cleaner than Kuwait City. The architecture also seemed better. Qatar Airways back to Heathrow from a trip that was successful on the business front and fascinating culturally.

Qatar Day 4 - swim, sauna and saunter

Down to business with offers and counter-offers, again over countless cups of coffee and tea. We came to an agreement then had lots of photographs, presentations and chat. Our drivers took us to the airport at around 4.30 for Qatar Airways flights to Doha. The Business Lounge was superb with full meals available. Arrived in Qatar late evening and took a taxi to the Millenium Hotel. Where we had a swim (pool on 7th floor), sauna (odd as it was steaming hot outside) and Jacuzzi. Took a walk in not so fresh air, at 36 degrees to the Chopsticks restaurant in the Grand regency, where we supped fizzy date juice and demolished a huge Chinese banquet. Nice to walk in the comfortably hot evening air (36 degrees!).

Kuwait Day 3 - down to business then chat

Cars whisked us off to the second round of meetings. This time the next level of detail. We went back to the hotel for a sleep before being taken out for a grand meal in the evening. This was interesting, as all of our Kuwaiti counterparts were women. So there were four men and one woman on our side, and 10 women on theirs. This gave both sides an opportunity to chill out and chat. All but one of our hosts covered their heads but they were as liberal and chatty as any group of women I’ve met. We discussed gay men in Kuwait, family, shopping, travel, mobiles, Facebook, cultural differences, women in politics......Their English was excellent and it is clear that English has become the second language in this part of the world.

Kuwait Day 2 - Business, Souk, Towers

Up and off for our first meeting in a cool 36 degrees and met by a team of women, some dressed in designer western clothes, others with hibabs, others in black from head to toe. The guys from the British Council were superb, giving us a cultural briefing – how to greet people, the business environment and Kuwaiti culture. First day was a series of presentations from both sides with endless cups of coffee, tea, water....hospitality at its best.

The wealth of an oil economy has its advantages, such as a high standard of living, no taxes and households with cooks, nannies and servants, but it also brings its problems. Of the 3.1 million in Kuwait only one third are Kuwaitis so there’s not a great incentive to work and diversify the economy. There’s a quota system so that private companies have to hire a certain proportion of Kuwaitis, but many have a poor attitude towards work or simply don’t turn up. Many young people are cosseted and lack initiative. Malls have become the social hub for young people and conspicuous consumption the norm.

Strange to see people openly talk with each other while you’re presenting, and the endless checking of mobiles. Kuwaitis love mobile phones and a few questions showed that social networking was huge.

Politically, the country has a parliament (50) and four women were elected in May, for the first time, causing a huge rumpus, when two turned up without covering their heads. Several religious hardliners walked out and it’s still a contentious issue. Then there’s the clash between the desires of the ruling family, who dominate the cabinet, and the elected parliament who are pushing for reform. This shows itself in the inevitable accusation of corruption.

A walk around the old market gave us that eastern feel, with the smells of perfume, spices, fish and freshly slaughtered meat. Pablo bought a couple of dishdashas (long white robes) for a fiver each, along with some hats. Unlike souks in Tunisia, Morocco and Egypt there was absolutely no hassle. Only polite exchanges and smiles. But boy it was hot, hitting 45 during the day and high 30s in the evening. The outdoor restaurants are bathed in a mist of cool water sprayed out by huge fans and the alleys were canyons of colour. Our drivers showed us around but we had the measure of the numbers and could read the Arabic prices.

Trip to the twin towers, Kuwait City’s main landmark. We took the lift to the viewing platform and saw the city at night on one side and the darkness of the gulf at night on the other. There were pictures of the damage wreaked on the towers during the 1990 Iraqi invasion. Even the hotel had a display of damage done to the hotel. Reparations are still being paid and leading to tensions between the two countries. The Iraqis were here for 100 days, on the grounds of slanted drilling into their oil fields and disagreements over money and borders. It was clear that the famous ‘incubator’ stories were propaganda, but the burning of 700 oil wells was not. That’s what the war reparations are about. Watch Jarhead for a sense of what it was like, a living hell of oil falling like rain, choking smoke and fierce fires.

Drivers here have huge powerful cars and SUVs but little in the way of etiquette or sense. Our drivers waited patiently then took us back to the hotel. The accident and casualty rate is frightening, with young men using the roads as race tracks and dozens of drivers on their mobiles. Back to the hotel for a huge Lebanese meal of mezzes and seafood. Stuffed as a camel bag. Drivers took us back to the hotel for our final night of luxury in Kuwait. A fine time was had by all – and business closed!

Kuwait Day 1 - Visas, Limousines and Hotels

Kuwait Airlines Business Class was pretty cool but arrival was chaotic with a ‘Swine Flu’ SWAT team waiting as we entered the terminal, masked up and ready to nab anyone with a cough or signs of sweat. As our visas were not there for collection, we had to make a few calls to get things sorted. Middle East Airports are full of transient workers from the sub-continent and far east, with a smattering of Arabs looking dashing in their dishdashas. Visas collected, we were met and delivered to the hotel in a couple of smart government cars. In an act of great generosity (the norm in this part of the world) the cars and their drivers were available for the entire trip. Suites at the Crowne Plaza were huge and you’ve got to love gold bathroom fittings!

These hotels are huge and rather strange western oases. The Crowne Plaza has seven restaurants, including a Texas Rib-Eye place with Phillipino girls dressed as cowboys. The one major difference is that the entire country is dry. The view from my window was one of a fawn coloured desert and roads filled with huge white cars – petrol is 12 pence a litre! The hotel had lots of Kuwaiti businessmen and a steady stream of Americans, who clearly work in oil or the military – all biceps, and cropped haircuts.

Day 5 - Farewell to Istanbul

Final morning at the Archaeological Museum with its famous collection of sarcophagi and excellent section on the history of Istanbul. They have a section of the Byzantine chain used to block off the Golden Horn and deal with the many churches one by one. Outside they have three gigantic porphyry sarcophagi that would have pride of lace in any other museum, but here are simply dumped in the garden. Then tram and funicular to Taksim Sqaure and off to airport. Public transport in this town is cheap and super-efficient - trams, buses, funicular and boats all connect and form one huge efficient web of connections. We tried them all. Final act was a glass of freshly squeezed pomegranate juice and a sesame bread ring - Istanbul's excellent fast food.

Day 4 – Istanbul – Walking walls of Byzantium

Tram to Tokpaki on the walls, then walked north on the outside of the walls to the Mirimah Mosque, then the Chora Museum, a red, byzantine, brick, Romanesque church with astounding mosaics. Then down to another similar but smaller Fetiye Church and down to the Bulgarian iron church, cast in Vienna and brought down to Istanbul in the 19^th century.

The 1600 year old walls are 6.5 Km and well worth the visit. They have been damaged by earthquakes and, of course, Mehmet’s cannons in 1453, but are still largely continuous. They kept our Attila’s Huns and withstood several other sieges, but in the end they were no match for the enormous Ottoman cannon. The walls and towers stretch from the Marmara sea to the Golden Horn. On our last visit we did the southern section, this time we headed north.

The Chora Church is a 13^th century church, converted to a mosque, then back to a museum. Its mosaics are among the best in the world, on a par with those in Ravenna. The church is relatively small, and the spaces intimate and well lit, making the experience very special. One oddity was the English film crew with a rather clichéd presenter in a white fedora and scarf, every bit the BBC ‘traveller and historian’ look.

We took a taxi to the Pierre Loti Cafe for lunch then took the funicular down to the Eyup Mosque. This is a place of pilgrimage for muslims, and the mosque had lots of people praying at Mohammed’s Standard Bearers tomb. There’s a footprint in marble, presumably of Eyup Ensari, who died during the 674 siege. This is a very balanced square mosque with eight semi-domes supporting the main dome and a huge plain tree in the courtyard.

We’ve had a scam pulled on us twice on this trip. A shoeshine guy drops his brush behind him, then, when you stop to pick it up and hand it back to him, he offers to do your shoes for free – but then expects payment. First time round, we simply refused to pay, the second time this happened, we all laughed out loud. You’ve got to admire their ingenuity, but the taxi drivers in Istanbul are just rogues, always trying to overcharge and bump up their false meter prices. On the whole, however, this is a city with friendly and gentle people. You get little or no unwanted attention, and if you’re lost, someone is sure to come up and help you with directions.

We keep bumping into two other guests from the excellent Niles Hotel – it’s that sort of place – small and friendly. One is an English chef, the other an American real estate agent. They’re friends, but only meet to travel together, both great fun. This is our second time in this hotel, and a very fine pace it is. The receptionist, Seda, is, without exaggeration, the greatest hotel receptionist in the world. She is receptionist, concierge, tourist guide, joker and friend all in one. It’s a fine little hotel. The terrace on the roof is spectacular – all for less than 50 euros a night.

Final evening meal in the Kumpaki Fish Restaurant, where we had Sea Bass, Sea Bream and Bluefish, along with the usual mezes and fruit.

Day 3 – Istanbul –Up the Bosphorus

Ferry from Emmanou zig-zagged from village to village up the 20 miles of the Bosphorus, dodging cross channel ferries, huge tankers and other boats. At the top we climbed up to the Genoan castle which has fabulous views of the Black Sea, then down for a superb lunch of Sea Bass, anchovies, sardines, beer and baklava. You sneak beneath two huge suspension bridges which connect Europe with Asia, pass palaces and the fortresses set up by the muslims in preparation for their attack in Istanbul. We even saw a dolphin. What a fine way to spend a day.

Back in Istanbul we visited the Yeni Mosqe, walked through the Spice Bazaar, then a rest before walking down to Hamdi’s for dinner. En route the restaurant staff implore you to eat in their establishments. We had them down on their knees and even ‘I will kill myself if you don’t eat here’. At Hamdi’s, we were given a window table overlooking the Galata Bridge and had an excellent white wine (Arozza, I think), lentil soup with mint, salad, kebabs, Turkish coffe and yet more baklava.